today i am here trying to rethink my life. i dont know what that word even means, i dont know what life means,  but still i am trying to figure that out. i can see colors out there i can feel them but cant make any sense out of them. Maybe life is all about just that you are here to feel it, live it, but not make sense out of it, but then thats my personal opinion and who am i to state whether its true or not. Life perhaps a controversy be a better name. Its 4 am and i am high as fuck. i dont know what i am writing but i am quite sure i would be able to make some sense out of it when sober like every other time. I sometimes think is it really me, am i my original self or just reflecting the light casted over me, isnt this something what so many of us feel from time to time. i have had so many phases in my life that now i am scared, scared to even continue, struggle is the part of life which if avoided will depreciate the growth of one self.